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02 June 2015 @ 06:02 pm
this years girl  
So I have barely posted at all this year. It's probably due to a combination of extraneous factors that deem writing as irrelevant. To recap would be both super easy and difficult at the same time because it feels like nothing has changed. But it has... I think. I've started my second of three terms at a college to continue my psychology training. I am more driven, I'm working harder and I'm getting better results. I am still fearful, scared of the possibly inadequate intelligence and temperament that I hold but I'm focused as hell. If I fuck up and don't make it into honours I do have a back up plan, bounce out of this comfortable lifestyle and move elsewhere, or at least, travel till I find my calling. Taking a year off last year really brought to my attention how hard the real world can be as naive as that sounds. Working constantly and loosing passion in everything you love is an instant byproduct of this. I'm definitely aware of my growth and contribution as a human in this world, actions have consequences et cetera et cetera. I've learnt from several months of travelling as well as countless hours at work how different things are when you leave the comfort that home or university study provides. I've felt shit, I've felt happy, I've felt grateful and I've encountered many people that I would never have anticipated to meet. Life moves a little too fast these days but in that, growth happens. God this sounds so fucking cliche, oh well that's where I'm at. I'm content with my life plan for the time being, I'm still enjoying myself and no surprise, still single which is probably the greatest feat to achieve for people my age. Selfishness prevails. So that's me for now, I may change within the hours or days or weeks to come but at least I've noted down what's going on in the world of me. Ever changing, never changing.